Saturday, August 28, 2010

Lessons from the Middle Kingdom.

On relatives: If you engage in conversation with any adult over 30, something like 10 minutes will be dedicated to how tall you are, how much you've grown, how much you can still grow, how tall your brother is, how much taller he can still grow, how tall you both are compared to every other kid they know. I don't know what it is about height that's so grippingly important, but it's probably some national inferiority complex.

On traffic: When I got into my first taxi, I noticed there were no seat belts in the back. Then I started wondering whether the customary bars implemented between the front and back seats were meant to protect the driver from shady clients....or me from a shady driver. Then my driver started yelling across the car to talk to another taxi driving beside us, whilst still driving himself. Then I figured I had a shady driver and reached for my seat b--nevermind.

On streets: 6 lanes, no pedestrian crossings. Do or die.

On food: The French have an ally in frogs' legs. And it tastes better than chicken. And yes, that is a piece of tortoise shell. And yes, I passed on that.

On Mao:
If there's a market for getting oneself photoshopped in a manly handshake with the guy, he evidently still matters.

1 comment:

small tsu said...

And another 10 minutes of conversation (if you're 20 or over and unmarried) will be about whether or not you have a boyfriend/girlfriend and who he/she is (if you have one) and how they need to meet them or if you don't have one, they'll ask you how you don't have a girlfriend/boyfriend yet. Sigh. Relatives.